Reading, PA: For years now, marginally educated Tea Party members have enjoyed regurgitating the Obama birth certificate issue. They claim that because he hasn't publicly shown his birth certificate, he is ineligible for the office of the President. It's also reported that they insist Pluto is still a planet, yet that is another issue for another article.
In an attempt to educate those otherwise unknowing of the constitution, DNP chairman Beau Dega released this memo: "Allow me to recite the passage of the constitution regarding this issue. No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States." The GOP declined comment, but it was overheard at a diaper-changing station in a bathroom at McDonald's that the Republican party was considering going door to door in a effort to teach Tea Party members how to read.
We report, we decide. We pretty much took all the stress out of it for you. You're welcome.
